Paul Stagg

Me..

After being encased in ice during the last ice age, many millennia ago – a small egg slowly escaped it’s frozen prison some 31 years ago (thank you global warming! – Go Green – Whatever!) and floated through the rivers and streams before being found and hatched.  And out came cute little baby Dino Stagg.

Being a half human, half dinosaur was never easy on me – the other regular kids would call me scaly, or mock my little t-rex arms…..or just run away as i would scare them…. but at a young age I found acceptance by becoming the fastest cycle rider in all the world, thanks to my reptilian DNA and the fact I would often bite the other cyclists….hampered by my stubby dino arms at first, i had these replaced with human arms and this made me even faster until one fateful day….when I discovered sandwiches.

The positive of my new found bread addiction was that I lost my taste for human flesh, but my incessant bread eating made me a fat lazy dino and so I am getting back in the saddle to regain my place as super dino stagg – cyclist racer and biter of humans….

Beware……*roooaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrr*

Names and places in the above story may have been changed to protect the actual people involved – some events have also been exaggerated to enhance your reading experience.  Please note that all dinosaur references are in fact true and scientifically accurate.

Leave a Reply